I’m Turning 30 (Aah!).
by Chris Kamalski
Since I am entering my 4th decade in two weeks (Ironically, just about the right amount of time to ship 30th birthday packages to 106 Emily Hobhouse, Pretoria North 0182, South Africa, ‘cough-end shameless plug-cough’), I have been realizing that a) I’m old, b) 30 is definitely the new 20, and c) I’m leaving this crazy decade behind, I found the following post on the Catalyst Blog particularly relevant.
If people in their 20’s took this advice to heart, watch out…
(via Brad Lomenick, http://bradlomenick.com/)
1. Use your 20’s to build a foundation for your 70’s. Create deep roots that will give you a foundation for when you are older. Finishing well means starting well.
2. Don’t worry about climbing the ladder. There’s no longer a ladder anyway. It’s more like one of those spiral staircases. And sometimes you are going across or down when you think you might be climbing. So don’t worry about it. Spend your 20’s learning and having life experiences. Travel, explore the world, take on projects that seem fun.
3. If your “career” path doesn’t make sense to anyone except for you, it’s okay. My 20’s: college at University of Oklahoma, wrangler on a guest ranch in Colorado, management consultant, business development officer, Magazine and media company, strategic business plan developer. WOW. That is all over the map. But God was orchestrating steps very clearly for what was next in my story. And continues to do so.
4. Be diligent and aggressive in developing your friendships and relationships. Create a core group of close friends who you want to do life with. This group may change a bit over the years, but it is imperative to find a circle of trust that you are committed to and they to you.
5. Figure out who you want to be, not what you want to do. Who you are is more important that what you do or where you live. Spiritually, financially, family, emotionally, relationally. Find two or three older, wise “sages” that you can learn from and count on as help.
Becoming Chris Kamalski 
Chris- 30 is not old (except to 20-somethings). In fact, you will soon discover that every other adult pretty much considers this the BEGINNING of adulthood. Sorry to the already-mentioned 20-somethings who think you are all that, but are more or less practicing for actual adulthood, which you won’t realize until you graduate.
And, you might want to check that address if you hope to receive any gifts. 106 Emily Hobhouse might work better…
Drinks are on me when we are together again, whichever continent may be hosting!
from the Catalyst blog to Rob Bell’s website – he will be in San Francisco on Feb. 19 and LA Feb. 20. Just a heads up – no location or other details…
I’m twice your age – I creak occasionally and don’t quite have the stamina I used to have; I’m not shaped quite the same as I was but I am in better shape than I used to be except when I was swimming, my hair changed color when I wasn’t looking – but all in all, it’s good. I am still learning, still loving family, music, books, beach, Yosemite -I’ve had more Bible study experiences/music experiences in the last 10 or so years than I had in the 25 years before that. I’m looking forward to visiting a bunch of Nat. Parks in the years to come (we’ve been watching Ken Burns’ National Parks series), and I’m sure there will be a time when I don’t have an actual job. Life seems to be a series of attached paths, some straight, some crooked, some hard, some easier, but all with fellow walkers of various sorts, led by our God who is good all the time.
[…] Field Stories [::Seven Months In::] I’m Turning 30 (Aah!). […]
Wisdom Mom, wisdom.
Bob Nichols replied to this post on my Facebook page and said ‘What does this make your teachers think, when you turn 30? 65 is the new middle age…’ I told him you’d agree whole-heartedly with that sentiment!
Arth: Agreed (on you buying me drinks!). No seriously, on what you say. I don’t even know if we make significant contributions to our lives/the Kingdom until we are 40 or so…I think God gives us a solid 20-25 years to figure ourselves out…
Hope you are well friend!
aly–i so agree! i want to pursue growth more fully as i get older, not less.
so much to learn!
so much to grow in!
so much to change to becoming…
miss you friend!
And the rebuttal from a cynical former coworker who probably needs to go to bed (hence the extra snarkiness):
#1: 30 is not old
#2: 30 is definitely not old enough to panic over
#3: If 30 is the new 20, then 20 is the new 10, which explains why my (your former) high school students act like 7-year-olds half the time. What’s wrong with keeping 30 the new 30? Or the old 30? Or just 30? Why the fear of aging? Perhaps something you (and our entire society) should take up in our souls with the Lord…?
#4: How do you use your 20s to build a foundation for your 70s when you’re using them to travel, have life experiences, and have fun? Advice pieces 1 and 2 are contradictory… Be careful you don’t sabotage your 70s by flaking in your 20s.
#5: Wacky career steps can be okay, but they can also be damaging when nobody wants to hire you because you’ve demonstrated a lack of stability and commitment. Jump around if it’s appropriate, but be cautious about it, too.
#6: Yes, who you are is more important than what you do, but what you do is not irrelevant. It certainly is not something you need to neglect in your search for your identity. Romanticizing finding your true identity or self can end up in too much drama and not enough groundedness.
Thank you, and Goodnight.
Matthew,
A rebuttal to your rebuttal:
-Don’t ever apologize for your snarkiness! This is you! 🙂
-Agreed with the age thing. Numbers are arbitrary to a large degree anyways. I feel like I’m just coming into a true season of living dependent with the Spirit, open to who I truly am (and am not). It’s taken until 30 to ‘begin’ that journey in some sense.
-#4 I disagree with you on, but that is fine. I would argue that those sorts of varied experiences (particularly in the 20’s decade) are the fuel through which the Spirit often builds and forms character in a person’s soul FOR the decades of their life to come. Now, of course this has been romanticized (particularly the travel notion of heading out into the wild to ‘find one’s self’), but when I look both generationally at 20-somethings, and even historically to a lesser degree at least this century, I find that search for self. Maybe it has increased exponentially the last couple of generations as postmodernism has taken further root?
-Heard a wise man one say ‘Never leave a ministry job that you have been at less than 3 years.’ I think this sentiment of sticking with something provides a great deal of growth for our generation, as well as soul food to discuss with God why we are so flighty as people…
Good thoughts as always Matthew!
Matthew Green – excellent!!! I wonder about changing jobs too often – it seems to me that roots are needed in a place or two for many, many reasons, not the least of which is a sense of family, of belonging, of reality (life isn’t full of many mini-vacations)(although I’ve always liked the idea of stopping whatever you are stressed about and thinking about a place you love to be that destresses you, a kind of mini-vacation), of being somewhere long enough to know the people and place well and therefore to appreciate it well, and because I love to garden and know about roots, to know that when you are in a place long enough that place and its people are in you. A ramble of sorts, but I’m missing my son and I wish roots for him on earth and in Heaven…
i miss you too mom!
As someone who’s lived through her 20-somethings, 30-somethings, and many of her 40-somethings, I have finally learned to consider “now” the best time of my life. Whereever you are, live in your moment – God has placed you where you are for a very good reason – don’t stress on it or wish it away. Just enjoy!
Love, love u oh wonderful nephew!