I May Be Insane.

by Chris Kamalski

I just took the MMPI-2 test again as I am in the process of applying to CRM long-term. I’m going to be assessed by a counselor regarding my health and overall well-being, and I thought the following questions were particularly insightful and relevant to my possibilities of being accepted. Enjoy this insanity, with my sarcastic wittyness in parenthesis (All answers must be True or False):

23. At times I feel like smashing things. (Who doesn’t?).
33. I have a cough most of the time. (Chronic coughing = Psychologically unhealthy?).
38. I have never been in trouble because of my sex behavior (Correct, yet who would admit this?).
49. I have enjoyed using marijuana (False, yet see #38).
51. I am very seldom troubled by constipation (Incredibly relevant to my ability to live missionally!).
69. My hands have not become clumsy or awkward (Huh?).
71. I believe I am being plotted against (Don’t we all?).
90. I am afraid of finding myself in a closet or small closed space (Most people’s fears involve places we hang clothes?).
199. Particular odors come to me at times (Only after eating broccoli or greasy Mexican food).
259. I like repairing a door latch (Umm, no).
286. I am not afraid of mice (Only Mickey).
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